Taking Back Your Peace
If you’re anything like me, the world current affairs have me riding an extreme rollercoaster. Up and down on the daily.
Regularly, I’ve found myself deep diving into things beyond my influence and have to remind myself about the power of focusing on our "Circle of Control" - (adapted from Stephen Covey’s Circle of Influence). These are the things that we can actually do something about. It's easy to get swept away by the news, other people's opinions, or just general life needs, and so I thought I would dedicate this post to how we can ground ourselves during potential tumultuous times.
Imagine your life as a series of three circles - one inside each other, like stacking dolls. The big outer one is everything that worries you, the middle one is what you can influence, and the inner one is what you can control. It's extremely tempting to spend all our energy on that outer circle, which can result in wasted effort and an evaporation of time! So, it’s important to focus on what we can actually change.
Here are three tips to help you stay within your Circle of Control:
Identify Your Circles: Take a moment to write down what's worrying you. Then, categorise each item into Control, Influence, or Concern. Seeing it on paper makes a huge difference. You'll quickly realise how much is outside your direct control.
Focus on Actionable Steps: For the items within your control, break them down into small, actionable steps. Try shifting your focus from worrying about a massive project, to completing the next small task. This keeps you grounded and productive.
Practice Letting Go: I find this to be the hardest one! When you find yourself dwelling on things you’re unable to control, gently redirect your attention. Try a breathing exercise, go for a walk, or engage in a something you love doing. It's about consciously choosing where to spend your mental energy.
Image credit: Mental Health Centre for Kids
“You can't always control what goes on outside, but you can always control what goes on inside.” - Wayne Dyer
To help you delve deeper into this, here are some resources:
Quote to ponder: The above quote from Wayne Dyer reminds us that our inner world is our sanctuary and fully within our control. What thinking does this give you?
"How to Stop Worrying and Start Living" by Dale Carnegie: This classic book offers practical advice on dealing with worry and focusing on what you can control, with actionable insights to support.
"How to Manage Overwhelm": This is a blog I wrote to support managing overwhelm. I share another tool in the text to help with working through what you can control, using our emotional systems from Paul Gilbert.
So, I’m curious, what strategies do you use to stay focused on your circle of control? I'd love to hear your thoughts! Please feel free to share any tips or tools that help you in the comment below.
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Wishing you peace and focused energy.